How I Prepare for Networking Chats (As an Introvert)
I’m knee deep in job hunting right now. Even though I’m a pretty short person, standing proudly at a smooth 5’ 1”, That’s still a lot of job hunting to be in! As an ambivert who leans more towards the introverted side of things, the idea of just talking to new people kinda freaks me out. Now I know that it’s a part of life and building connections with people is a very important factor in securing a job, but it’s still something that I sometimes shy away from. However, I’m learning along this journey that staying in my shell does nothing for me. It’s cold and dark in there. Nothing changes if nothing changes. If I want new results then it means I must take on new habits, and one of those habits (especially now) requires me to reach out to new people and build connections. Building connections with people can range from something as simple as sending a LinkedIn request (with no note lol) or to something as bold as having a phone call or even a zoom chat. I took the scary leap and decided to go above and beyond what I usually do and actually schedule phone calls with people. So if you are anything like me and you tense up at the thought of talking to new people (especially while under the stress of job hunting), here’s a few things I do that put my mind at ease before a call.
Understand My WHY
It’s not lost on anybody on LinkedIn that if someone reaches out to them to connect, it's usually for a potential job opportunity. However I make sure to dig a little deeper. Before I even send a request to someone there HAS to be something about them that draws me in. Is it curiosity about their unique job title? Did they work on a project I want to know more about? Are they affiliated with an organization that does work I love? There has to be a reason. Nothing makes me feel more comfortable talking to new people than me ACTUALLY finding them interesting. Moving with curiosity helps me have less anxiety.
Have Talking Points
As someone who finds peace in prepping, I actually love this part. When I get nervous I tend to go mentally blank and just freeze up. This used to happen to me alot in conversation as a kid. I learned that when I have talking points ready, I’m more comfortable with conversation with new people. My mind knows where to go and conversation moves much more smoothly. Plus it doesn't waste the other person’s time. Coming with talking points and questions already prepared has helped me get straight to the point of the convo and get the specific help I need. Shout out to people that can just wing it. Lucky You! As for me, I have to prepare diligently for situations like this
Eat
I mean, if I’m hungry I’m not gonna be able to concentrate. DUH lol
Spruce Myself Up (even if it’s not a video call)
Nothing makes me feel more confident than when I look good. Even if it's putting on a cute lounge set, I like to feel like I put myself together. I’ve noticed that when I just drag myself onto a call I’m not at ease. My mind isn't settled and even if it’s not a video call I’m a little self conscious of how I’m coming across. When I take the time to maybe put away the food I was eating and wipe my mouth, or throw on a cute pair of earrings, or even do something cute and simple with my hair it gives me a little confidence boost. I’m able to give myself a little TLC before something stressful and through my actions remind myself that I am worth the extra effort to pamper myself a bit just like I’m worth the extra thousands of dollars in my salary (if there is a hiring manager reading this).
Imagine That They Are Constipated
Sorry if this is too gross for some of y’all but this works for me lol. You know how they say “Just imagine that everyone is in their underwear during a scary presentation”? Well… that doesn’t work for me! Some people actually look good in their underwear and THAT will make me more nervous. But taking a dump is the ultimate equalizer. NOBODY looks good grunting over a toilet trying to push one out. Plus it's uncomfortable. (Follow me, I promise you I’m taking you somewhere sensible). Imagining that someone is in a more uncomfortable situation than me makes me feel less uncomfortable. So by comparison being constipated is WAAAAY more uncomfortable than talking on the phone to someone new. It makes sense to me in my head lol. If you get it, then you get it.
Remember That We Are All Mere Mortals and That Comet That Wiped Out The Dinosaurs Can Also Wipe Everybody Out Today
Nothing like reflecting on the fragility of humanity to make intimidating people seem less intimidating.
